Friday, January 15, 2010

I am only human.

Mwuhaha! ^w^

So my stomach is barely getting better, it held down food today! Yay me ^__^ though I wasn't able to eat breakfast or lunch.

Which reminds me The Ocean isn't getting any better. I bet I annoyed him with my useless rants at lunch but now I'm starting to get abit....concerned. Is his arrogant self wouldn't get this down. I have mixed things to say about that however....because he is arrogant. Meh.

When I take naps or go to sleep I wake up feeling like I just spent time cuddling with a lover. That sweet feeling (nothing physical -__-;) that you have somebody and were just with them...I wonder why? I wonder if it happens to other people! Gah but I wake up and yeah it takes awhile to fade away but I'm glad boys don't really stir me anymore.

Except for Prince...darn him! I had lunch with him today and I couldn't help but stare...he is the most beautiful boy/young man I have met in my life...it's so hard to pull my eyes away...I know what I said in my last blog and it hasn't changed I'm just struggling...I mean what I feel inside for him right now are like little ripples that formed way after the rock had been thrown. They'll disappear soon enough..

Ah! Today I talked to Amuse about Bug Eyes. I encouraged him to date her and ask her out. I think it helped! ^__^ I guess deep down I know that even if we aren't friends nor enemies I know how she must feel right now and it'd be a crime to not help her be happy...aha...

Im listening to the Avatar soundtrack...oh how I love that movie! I too suffered a slight depression when the dimmed light glow back and I walked outside that movie theatre only to see the Earth that was decaying and not the beauty I had felt and seen; Pandora. I not ashamed because I know that I was one of the millions who felt the same and worse. Being a human sucks.

Anywho Poser is trying to get my guard weaken from the election. We are to turn in out papers Wed. and he is acting all wanna-be lover nice. As if. That mongrel has torn my heart up before I dont trust him at all. I'll just have to fight harder to win. I hope that putting my heart into it will do it. That's the only thing I have!

Ah I feel like crying. I hates defending myself from guys who have hurt me before. I feel pretty vulnerable against them because they have crossed my guard before. No wait I let them. So Im texting Poser right now and Im all shaky. Bastard! Why can't he leave me alone?!?! The tears are burning my throat...Im getting off.

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