Monday, January 25, 2010

Lovers In Osaka

Osaka Sun Mix. Teh Best!!! Makes me all happy and flaily!!

So me sick, have an annoying stuffy nose! I feel so useless without it so horrible v.v BUT today will not be a gloomy blog! Even if my dad's being a butthole (thats so another story) XD hahaaaaaa!

Me and Skeleton made up. I got to hold him!! It felt so right!! He even cried with me..I feel special that I was able to witness him letting some of it out. I wish I could cry. I mean a physics test made me cry and nothing else can!! I guess my fear of failure is pretty darn big. O__o HA! I LAFF AT YOU! I will overcome ^__^ so well Skeleton in his battle. I believe in him. I love that guy!! ^__^

Since when have hindu's been so darn cute O.o Old Rival and Mohinder as so not ugly O__O I mean dont think im being racist it's just that I've never looked at them that way...like some chicks dont dig black dudes? (but I dated a oreo once *coughPosercough*) but yeah XD maybe it was the music...XD hahaaaaa (new laugh XD) but its all good ;D so funny today a sub thought me and Old Rival liked each other...why do we give off those vibes?! That and Mohinder is a nerd but a flirt. Rare combo. Awesome! Rumor has it he likes a shy nerd cutey. Cute valid gossip FTW XD

I love oranges!! Their my new favorite fruit!! But shhhh dont tell that to Apple..(was even my nickname back in freshmen year!)

Which reminds me! Im over the freshmen titling me "Heartless" (sometimes Heartless Bitch) Cuz bottom line is they don't know my story or what caused me to end up actually living up to the censored title. I told the fishy no and I'm glad. I didn't want to do something I felt forced to do. Hope he finds happiness by himself. Cuz depending on someone for it will never work. Tis life. You came 'ere alone and yer leavin' alone! Ain't need nobody! (Love that! XD)

Today we made bracelets in Colorguard class! It made me soo happy! Because it's been years since I've had made some with people who were actually interested in it. It was a mother/daughter thing waaay back when I was only child. Im trying to get my sister into it and later on my mom (again). Since it isn't working so far I enjoyed that it worked here! n-n

You can even see my new little gauge! (the other one is a two but I decided to match now)

Tis all I'm off to devour a orange! While listening to Osaka Sun Mix of course!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Nom nom nom!!

Today! I woke up officially sick (was feeling a tad bit ill last night) and now I have the tired eyes and sore throat with a runny nose to match. Icky Ick Ick!!!

Today I got a gift from Gangsterlicious! A masquerade mask! So pretty! Then I looked up her video gift...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_IpV7KDYnU8
(The Shizz! XD)

I love that girly! We are so close when together is Poser sees us as lovers XD! HA! Ahhh today was the creative writing meeting, which means the Officer Positions were given out. I was given Event Coordinator. Poser is still running for Vice President against Skeleton. Me and Gangsterlicious were furious. Poser was mad for not getting President! Can you believe that?! That title alone is such a big thing!!! Ugh!! Gangsterlicious was given Treasurer (She's flustered about it XD) but now realizing what my title means, I embrace it as "The Boss of Events AKA the fun stuff" so I'm happy XD I just hope Skeleton gets that position! He's writing is marvelous....though he has cut off all bonds to me. That is fine. My heart is no longer beating.

Tis cold! But I consider it a good thing. No more bonds to any guy. Though I wonder who will reawaken it? The freshmen boy couldn't. Boy did he try though. I feel like it's my duty to belong to him though
even that is fading away. Aha! ^__^

Amuse and Bug eyes are together :3 Awe I can't help it...Im happy for them, especially her...I almost texted her but In the end couldn't. Perhaps I will smile at her...maybe that will send my message? XD Ah silly am I...

Which reminds me! Today I wore very heavy eyeliner. Ta da! XD

I resemble the Joker just abit...O.o! Was fixed and perfected by my Guard Girly Killer Tomatoe XD

I caught The Prince staring at me with his mouth slightly agape...I giggled. Must say I enjoyed it. (One of my code name peeps is behind me XD!) Ah I plan to do more crazy make-up stunts now. XD just for fun! Maybe the clown triangles next? Ahaha!

School wise I plan to get tutored sometime next week by a smart fellow - Mohinder (after a smart fellow from Heroes XD ahaha! He reminds me of him)

Which reminds me a flirted with a dude....OwO I liked it XD he's code name 'Old Rival' because back in 8th grade we would hit each other but now he makes me laugh and we get a lot quite nicely :3

At lunch I sat with Evil Spawn! Hadn't seen her in such a good mood! Made me very relaxed and happy ^_^! 7th Period was better today! Though everything I touched broke so that wasn't swell ._.;! Aha!

So that was my day! ^__^

During this blog a made a tower of dirty tissues. XD Ewwww!!

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

My Birthday~

I was unbelievingly happy today!!!

I am very thankful to God for being alive one more year >D!! I was also very blessed to have so many people help celebrate it! Evil Spawn gave me a ducky and The Sun! Omg the most heartwarming card ever...I wanted to cry!! OMG Mama (codename for a laidback friend of mine!) gave me the gift that made me scream at lunch....the first american manga volume of...KUROSHITSUJI!!!! >

However all gifts were dearly cherished I'm very thankful!! Even the money!~ (The squirts surprise card was very beautiful as well, my little squirt~! The lil sis!)

But then....7th period...I CRIED BECAUSE OF A STUPID PHYSICS TESTS. Can ya imagine that?! I am seeking help on the subject now though and i'm over it. so HA!! Besides a Biology major has to pass through it...I also plan to sit by Kitty and Doofus. I wont let them be the cause of me moving...enough nonsense!

I had practice today! I made up with The Ocean...I ended up apologizing! It was to merry a day to let that get between us. I will not consider myself beneath that girl any longer. After I am Karen Terrazas!! XD! So it was fun! We completed the show and now we just gotta fill in the stuff! Im very excited! We have improved!! WUTATATA!! (something a fellow guard pal says XD love it!!)

So im listening to the indian music from the soundtrack XD so wicked! My cousin likes this stuff! Seems pretty cool yo! Woo!!

Ah I feel so loved! Couldn't ask for more ^o^!! So with that I'm off to shower!!!

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Nigram Clavem

The title is the name of one of the songs from the OST of my favorite anime. Kuroshitsuji. It is beyond amazing. The OST is pure gold. A treasure....the music touches my soul!! I bet I sound like a drama queen but it really does...Eheh!~

Ah! I was glad that not a single tear was shed after what Poser did too me. I ended up reading till it all passed away. Was pretty rough though.

Today I went to church, a solid one tear managed to escape. I guess thats a good thing...though I wonder if I'll ever be able to cry again. Like tears actually coming out...

They sang me happy birthday! Though it was kinda forgotten T_\\ but I greeted a guy there who's codename is Box Puzzle. In our hispanic culture you usually greet each other with a kiss and ours was almost an actual kiss, freaked me out O_O I stubbled back to my chair and blushed...wow that was stupid!

Anywho! Button has asked for an explanation of her codename! All codes names have a pretty good definition to them ;] so here is hers!

Button: She can really be cute like one. Like a button has a very important purpose. She's always been there though I haven't noticed her all the time.

This your meaning! Hope I didn't disappoint! <3

A fish who caused a drama storm has come back to me as a friend who doesn't act like one, who acts like he wants more. Im being very cautious but we used to be tied quite closely together so this is odd. Hm.

Tis all! I'm all half focused since the music is taking my focus...<3

New season aires 31st YUSH!!!

Friday, January 15, 2010

I am only human.

Mwuhaha! ^w^

So my stomach is barely getting better, it held down food today! Yay me ^__^ though I wasn't able to eat breakfast or lunch.

Which reminds me The Ocean isn't getting any better. I bet I annoyed him with my useless rants at lunch but now I'm starting to get abit....concerned. Is his arrogant self wouldn't get this down. I have mixed things to say about that however....because he is arrogant. Meh.

When I take naps or go to sleep I wake up feeling like I just spent time cuddling with a lover. That sweet feeling (nothing physical -__-;) that you have somebody and were just with them...I wonder why? I wonder if it happens to other people! Gah but I wake up and yeah it takes awhile to fade away but I'm glad boys don't really stir me anymore.

Except for Prince...darn him! I had lunch with him today and I couldn't help but stare...he is the most beautiful boy/young man I have met in my life...it's so hard to pull my eyes away...I know what I said in my last blog and it hasn't changed I'm just struggling...I mean what I feel inside for him right now are like little ripples that formed way after the rock had been thrown. They'll disappear soon enough..

Ah! Today I talked to Amuse about Bug Eyes. I encouraged him to date her and ask her out. I think it helped! ^__^ I guess deep down I know that even if we aren't friends nor enemies I know how she must feel right now and it'd be a crime to not help her be happy...aha...

Im listening to the Avatar soundtrack...oh how I love that movie! I too suffered a slight depression when the dimmed light glow back and I walked outside that movie theatre only to see the Earth that was decaying and not the beauty I had felt and seen; Pandora. I not ashamed because I know that I was one of the millions who felt the same and worse. Being a human sucks.

Anywho Poser is trying to get my guard weaken from the election. We are to turn in out papers Wed. and he is acting all wanna-be lover nice. As if. That mongrel has torn my heart up before I dont trust him at all. I'll just have to fight harder to win. I hope that putting my heart into it will do it. That's the only thing I have!

Ah I feel like crying. I hates defending myself from guys who have hurt me before. I feel pretty vulnerable against them because they have crossed my guard before. No wait I let them. So Im texting Poser right now and Im all shaky. Bastard! Why can't he leave me alone?!?! The tears are burning my throat...Im getting off.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Malice and Spite take a break.

Button! I made her shoe fly during lunch when it tripped me. XD best part of my day besides buying books *huggles them* the bookfair lady was from England; Yorkshire!! Oh how it reminded me...I love that accent and afterwards it came out in a sentence. XD My professors eyes popped out like "wha?!" XD haha!

So today I saw Prince and his Princess. I felt sad for a second. Then I was like "He isnt my real prince then..." so toodles! (easier said then done but I'm getting there)

Then I talked to Amuse today, Bug Eyes and him will be an item soon and oddly enough it didn't affect me. I think I just gave up on dating during high school. XD woot woot! It was about time I gave up XD

Anywho today at the Creative Writing Club; (Yes I love it and I'm proud) One of my ex flings/bf whatever you wanna call a three day relationship declared that he would run for a position just because I said I wanted to. My thoughts? I WILL CRUSH YOU. YOU WILL NOT WIN. I refuse to let someone take away my hopes for something I really do cherish!!! Me and Gangsterlicious want to be a team! Isn't that perfect?! Guess I'll just have to knock him down. He's codename - Poser.

Skeleton read a poem during the meeting...it was soul touching. He glanced at me and for a spilt second I felt teary eyes. My felt my face contort. It reminded me of me...it was simply....It wasn't even short! The blows just kept on comin'!

Today at lunch The Ocean was very quite. Sad and kept to himself...seeing him like that was "Sweet Revenge." I see no point in lying it felt good.

In 7th period I was pretty alone, I commented here and there nothing big BUT one of our AP's took Doofus out the classroom!! I was so sure I was going to get called out too!! I felt bad that he left. (Though you gotta admit he's way of leaving was pimpin') Funny I dont feel bad for my jerk of a friend but I do for a jerk who isn't my friend. Whoa? Besides The Ocean still isn't talking to me. Pfft. As long as he isn't rude I don't mind.

Lately oranges have been the most stomach filling thing ever, I drank spoiled milk last night. Yes I was so thirsty I didn't pay attention to the rancid taste. Gawd Jin v.v! That and I didn't eat since lunch at school, I thought I was going to pass out during practice (which ends at 7) I think I'm going to eat another one...I jeez I hope I dont sound like an old sour lady O__O I think I do...oh jebus XD

College....all the crap is coming up fast a race car. Im terrified. My rank is 151. Talk about shiz. I need to bring it up next year. My last chance. I have no idea how I will fight this but I have too. I have made my top three choices. One is out of state. (Journey's fault which reminds me...) but as Kandee says the most beautiful flowers come from manure. XD I feel poopy. Let's hope a flower will grow! XD

Journey! Well after a event in Algebra II I ended up finding something about Journey. I made me want to hurl because I was so nervous wrecked. I told Gangsterlicious but she didn't really know what to say which is normal...I told The Sun I wonder what she'll say...? The opinion of those two are like priceless XD like their my left ad right hand women. LOL! Funny because after freaking out over Poser being a butthole I was like "I need gangsterlicious."
"You know you just said you needed a female right?"

"Yes."

"Have you ever thought about being gay?" That mongrel. Which he is. Bwuhahaha.

Haiti! God help them! I saw footage n read articles....It's horrible but I admire them. Fighting to survive, punching bricks and slabs of cement to escape the pancaked building. I truly admire them. I hope that they are saving as many survivors as possible...

OH! I found a new favorite latin phrase!! "Quod me nutrit me destruit." "What nourishes me destroys me." Love it! Angelina Jolie has it tattooed in latin. Made me wonder about tattoos...If I were ever to get one I would get one in foreign handwriting and down my back. Those are so hot...XD anyways im off to eat an orange. XP

My entrys have gotten lengthy OwO


Tuesday, January 12, 2010

And an old volcano erupted. The End. :]

7th period. Last one of the day. Your hyper we're-almost-out period. Mine's a GET-ME-OUT-OF-HERE period. It's filled with people I know! Ya would think it's a good thing right? NO!! Ya see...Skeleton doesn't talk to me there because Gangsterlicious says he doesn't know how to handle me....that's my fault. I act rather schizo. around him XD; ahaha. Guess it doesn't help that we dated freshmen year v.v

ANYWHO!

So ya see Kitty and Doofus ( a new kid to me) well I feel unwanted by them shunned you can say, well to be specific it's Doofus. I guess I made a bad first impression? Kitty says he's like that to everyone but I have a gut feeling about it x_e ick. So I was left with a creepy band kid to help me (who stalked me last year) Which he actually did. but I noticed Skeleton and the duo and felt lonely....it was quite depressing.

What hit the spot was when Kitty said something about Bug Eyes (ex best friend; we become too different to stand each other. I annoyed her, and that annoyed me.) That she likes Amuse. Amuse is a very flirtatious boy who I texted during the break....and by accident grew a crush?Ahhhhhh!! This has happened before with Bug Eyes! Neither one ended up with the guy, simply because in the end I drifted away from him XD However I know that Amuse is never serious with what he says so I honestly wonder...bwuhahaha.

Listening to Queen - We will rock you. XD sha-weet!

Oh! I also remembered that with The Ocean, he'll never say he's sorry, XD we magically exchanged words today....I was happy. I do care about that little scumball. XD

Ah my aunt's food is heavenly, it brings me back to life! I managed to get myself over there today before Guard Practice! Reminding me of the good ole' days!! I see that Squirt (my lil sister :3) Also enjoys it too! Just thought i'd say it since well...she really did bring me back to myself simply with her food. I hope to visit her Monday!~ Or next Friday....oh how I wanna go back..

So in this entry I thought I would introduce Button. XD She got me into blogspot and for that I owe her quite alot! I feel like im bonding with her as I read her entries...wonder if Button feels the same? XD That and she saved my butt at lunch when Ocean was still being a jerk and said there was no room for me at the table. Cuz once I was there Button talked to me and I felt like I belonged. XD

Me and Gangsterlicious talked about love today. We both agree that its the first love inwhich you truly love because afterwards its the memory of that love that blueprints the rest of your relationships. So for that my dear readers, I can honestly say that a piece of my heart still belongs and lingers with Journey. (first love. Nuff said) And I guess I can openly admit it now. Uwah~

I can finally take a breathe knowing I have vented. Feels good. Hungry now, Byes!

Monday, January 11, 2010

OH SNAPS! Whirlwind ;3

WEEEE! Darn! I just finished the bag of my favorite cookies ._.!! The circus animal cookies! Covered in frosting and sprinkles.....@w@

Well! Today was pretty darn good!!! I made up with Evil Spawn!!! YAAY! I had a dream that I took her by the arm and made up so the next day I did just that XD It worked! We hugged a long time, I bet bystanders thought we were lovers XD but right after I saw The Sun and ya know what? She was so happy for us she almost cried! (Mind you I also did too) But that really is a great best friend! I love em both! Hopefully the tete-a-tete between us will we the finishing patchwork to our relationship! ^__^

Im wearing a band-aid on my wrist O-o i dunno why but it's been stuck all day XD mwuhahaha!

Okay so Kitty (codename) was reading lovely bones today...I wikied it so I know the basics of the story if not more..and I read the rape section. Made me feel so weak and flimsy. I couldn't speak and I felt like I was stepping on knives. As soon as the bell rang I went to find Gangsterlicious and simply hugged her. It's cute how she soothed me afterwards x3 but yeah it'd been bugging me. I know Susie Salmon isn't real but...*shivers*

OMG~ So I went to the bachelor's party (got stared at by a weirdo and remembered a play I saw in England - Fiddler on the Roof ) and I wore eyeshadow!! For the first time, so im slowing submerging myself in the whole make-up world! Though i'll never know why every M.A.C sales person I talk to ends up being mean. O_o go sephora?

Anyways here's a picture of mi first try XD Lets hope I improve! (Kandee Johnson Fan ^__^v)

Darn my lips are chapped v.v!!

P.S I saw The Prince today ._. he cut his hair. pffft.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Loneliness is a Bit**

Oh man XD So everything was SUPPOSE to get better correct? Ahahaha most horrible week ever XD!!

So, two of my band friends The Ocean and Evil Spawn (a best friends ;3) are mad at me. I cant even sit with them at lunch anymore. The are astoundingly good at making me feel invisible and ignoring my existence. I argued with them so its not totally their fault though im always apologizing....I refuse to scum to it anymore. Ehh...price for it? Becoming a loner XD!! I mean I can ignore them and act like they dont exist just to save myself from some extra pain but that doesn't mean it doesnt sting. I have no idea how this will end but I hope it gets fixed.

See I chose my band friends over my 'rocker' buds and we drifted apart so trying to get into their world is abit....iffy. It doesnt help that in 3 of my classes i dont know anyone either XD

But keep moving forward right? Things should straighten out in the end. If not my only escape is college, one and 1/2 more years before a completely new slate is available.

It's also amazing when the people you least expect step in and help pull you back up. Cuuuz...

After school I kinda cried after The Sun left but Mandi an awesome band chick got me out of my muck, making me go wild with a random sugar high XD Gah! I love her! Blondie Rocker also came in and helped pull me back up. It's amazing! Because I never imagined that they would come in and that THEY would be the ones to help me endure. Im thankful.

This Vid also made my day. XD
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1927354

So, it's Saturday! And today is my cousins SECOND bachelors party XD whoa!!! So ima be all like "JIN IN TEH HOUSE!!!" XD Let's see how that goes ne?

And I called Evil Spawn. Guess she ignored that too. :x

Viva DJ Earworm!! XD

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

First Day Back....Ready for the roller-coaster ride?

My Goodness...Everything was wack! I really am not fond of my new schedule. I felt so lonely when I didn't have english with Gangsterlicious. I barely know anyone in any of my classes! Sucks!
T_T However this day was beyond the usual dose of bi-polarnessness. Why?
Okay first I saw The Prince waaay to much. Hard to believe i've had a crush on this guy for almost two years. So I decided to talk to him and clear up a misunderstanding we had. PFFFFFT. It went as expected, he was stunned and I was...me. Then afew periods later, I find out he REALLY likes someone. Talk about mega ouch! Gangsterlicious is on the case! Though im learning to let go of him and with that my hope of finding a steady bf. XD how sad!! So I was pretty bummed. Two things pulled me together though! A quote given from a friend and a random reminder.

"Just when the caterpillar was about die it turned into a butterfly." Kinda cheesy but who cares!
and
"Jesus is Hope!" ^__^v

Then colorguard practice was next! Overall we did work that was pretty darn good, can't complain I even goofed off more then I should have. There was a linked sour moment though. The Ocean (Another codename for a infamous male in my life) decided that he would pick on me. He really hurt my throat, still hurts...and well he made me miss one of closet male friend ever! Like a brother, like blood! So I cried ._. Orchid (Codename for one of my best friends since we meet in '08 ;3) helped the stubborn tears out. Which I'm thankful for. Since oddly enough it takes alot to make me cry.

Ah! But I drank alot of apple juice and that was niiiiice 8D and once I got home I found a package waiting for me! I was so eager to open it x3! Inside was the hair product I so badly need for my haircut. Green Gatsby! From Japan >w<

See! ^o^!! It really made my day!! Let's hope tomorrow is a better one though :]

Monday, January 4, 2010

Before Back To School....

So I spent my vacation I'd say very well. Had alot of fun, and spoke so much spanish! Was very lazy but did alot of things I hadn't done, like connect with my youth group n stuff! x3

Because of the new years I also feel like I started out fresh, new slate! So Im pretty nervous about tomorrow...ahaha I bet I sound silly XD I even got Gangsterlicious abit twitchy with all my whining. XD Aha Gangsterlicious is a codename for one of my Best Friends btw! So lets hope all goes well ^^v

Ah I found this awesome nail polish which is now my current favorite!


See! It so cute! With glitter and pink stars, I lurve it! I think ima starting putting stickers under a clear coat...seems uber cute... XD

Anywho! Today I visited my Aunt who taught me how to cook this chicken thingy thingy! I had fun and even made notes my excuse "College." because for a sec. she was like "Marriage." SCARY.

XD ahaha oh man! being in that house sure brought back memories! I was raised there for 6 years and man I love that women! XD My nephew and niece were there and got to see him in his sleepy baby mode! He keep staring at me and it was adorable! Hope to visit again friday!

Hmmm eyeshadow, go or no go? O-o

Friday, January 1, 2010

New Years!!~

WEE!!! XD

So New Year's came in and it was fun~ I actually got closer to one of my cousins who's codename will forever be 'X' x3

X is a very spiritual guiding person. She's older then me by 7-8 years but that doesn't stop us from being close and sharing some pretty good laughs! For the longest time she's been the only person that I can talk to while im at church..

I also ate mexican tamales....simply heavenly >3 The lovely lady who made them was my aunt's mother-in-law. Whoa! Strong willed women! When it comes to mexican tamales I only like hers so I basically ditched all the other dishes XD

Since I was at church....I got to hit a pinata XD which hit me in the face x_o! I was blindfolded nuuuuuuuu!!

Sadly we weren't able to go to my cousins house afterwards but I did get to talk to X till four XD

So overall good good! Oh and did I mention I made a new friend? ;3

Mwuhahaha and to finish my first blog ever!! A picture! 8D

P.S New Year Resolution - Keep Moving Forward! ;3